Sunday 2 December 2012

Expectation Vs Relations

An understanding of life's meaning being critical to a progressive society, understanding  relations and what we expect from them is something  too intricate to understand. .Somewhere within us, we all have desired that at some point in life, someone must clarify this subject eventually. I know this is something way beyond discussion or writing but today my ongoing thoughts are forcing me to pen down these things in front of you all and know your views.

Hope by the end, we would be able to get something fruitful...

In general, when we discuss, everyone says it is wrong to keep expectations in any relation. But according to my view, is expecting a reciprocation in any relation is wrong?. Let me state here, that by relations, I don’t mean only a relation between a couple, what I meant any relation, can be our relationship with our parents, siblings, relatives or our friends.

How does a lady feel who has been married to a person for more than 30 years? As  per the lady, love, relation, understanding is all she looks forward to in her relation., Here the best thing is to quote her own words  "The thing about being married to the same man all my life is it's given me the beautiful honor of falling in love with him over and over again." What she's not saying, is the truth. In order to have the beautiful honor of falling in love with him over and over again, she's also fallen out of love with him over and over again . Those devastating words might signal the end of a relationship, but they may not. All she is expecting in her relation with her husband is just a bit of reciprocation of feelings.

Similarly, in our relation with our parents,  who taught us the meaning  of every relation, they  bring us up and take care of us for years  and are, also worried for us to be safe, loving us unconditionally.  In fact I would like to say here they start loving us even before we come into the form of a piece of blood and flesh. In return, they never expect anything more than a little reciprocation of love and care. Is it wrong on their part to expect this much?

In same fashion, if I talk about our friends, if we  give our full attention and support to our friends who need a true ear to listen and guide him/her, is expecting the same in return is wrong ?. If we give our friends or a friend in particular some importance or a position in our life as a human, we tend to  desire a bit of reciprocation or acknowledgement of the same. It is not always necessary to prove a friend in need is a friend in deed but only sharing, caring and acknowledgement can make the bond stronger with each passing day.

What I feel in any of the relationship without a little reciprocation, then the person who is weak in expressing has to undergo the one of the most painful things any person can ever hear.  devastating. This situation of an individual can even lead that person to feel where others words like, ignorance can feel like the end of the world.

Such a person usually feels a loss of desire, and love and desire keep relations together for the long heave. The feeling of being devastated and lonely is powerful and when it wanes it leaves a relationship feeling hollow. What I feel, that the relationships that last a lifetime or even a long time will always experience the ebb and flow. This flow always makes relations work and make them long term, else things become stagnate and boring .

Some where I have read ‘Buddhism teaches us that nothing is permanent’ . When it comes to relationships that might mean, that a relationship itself might be temporary if reciprocation or acknowledgement is not there. It also might mean that the state of the relationship must change if a relationship is to continue to exist.

At the end, I would like all my readers to share your views in evaluation to thoughts, lets share our view points and get to understand things and relations in a more better way.

Monday 22 October 2012

Book Review – ‘By losing You I found how much I needed You’ by Dr Rachit Bhushan

 ‘By losing You I found how much I needed You’ by Dr Rachit Bhushan
This is the debut novel by Dr Rachit Bhushan.. and when I got my copy of his book I was not able to hold myself to start with the journey of  “Rachit n Pari”.

 This is a story about two strangers, a journey of  ‘Rachit & Pari’, ., who met as acquaintances in ‘Rachit’s sister marriage but happen to fall in love….. their love was so passionate so innocent, they were by each others side in all thik & thins of life..till they  part . Dr Rachit Bhushan, who  is a doctor turned writer has been felicitated by the Indian Medical Association for his book and his novel also is recommended by the cricketing maestro Mr. M. S. Dhoni.

The story of Rachit and Pari moves further with different twists and turns by virtue of destiny in it….to know how and what one has to read ‘By losing You I found how much I needed You’.
Now my Positive viewpoints:
This is the debut novel of Dr Rachit Bhushan whose tagline is this book is not a chick lit love story  or a Mills and Boons romance. It is a relation between two strangers who never meet in their whole life, yet they possess a beautiful bonding between them. Dr Rachit Bhushan has done a good job and justification to this love story. I just loved the way he has mentioned his characters (Rachit’s parents, his sister, his friends, Pari’s family and friends Rads and all) which seem lively enough. He has explained the beauty of Nepal so well that it seems flashing in front of readers while reading the book. Also he has explained the practicality of the metropolitan cities very well and the nature of people out here.., as some are really helpful and some will be just acquaintances, nothing more then that. He has explained the chemistry, the bonding between ‘Rachit & Pari’ really well.

The way  ‘Rachit & Pari’ used to talk on phone without the knowledge of their parents and the way they have sent gifts to each other on their birthdays was so very romantic. The problems faced by Rachit during his medical training and the way Pari has always supported and guided him, shows her caring nature towards him. These are some indescribable feelings.

Indeed I would agree with MS Dhoni (Captain of Indian Cricket Team), this book is a reflection of the common man’s story. This story of Rachit & Pari has been described very beautiful and emotional. I really felt miserable  when Rachit got his leg fractured. This a sweet, romantic love story of Rachit & Pari but has a tragic end to it ,and only the day when Rachit would meet Pari probably then  the unanswered questions will be answered.
Some suggestive points:
Although the book’s end shows a different aspect of Life & Love which is a tragedy … in general a reader always expects a happy ending or a settled future for both, in their respective lives..

I would Like to state few more things as a bit of synchronization need to done,  because on some places a reader is taken back in flash back of the story which is Rachit’s childhood, his school days, and immediately in next chapter Rachit is talking about his current state in his life. These things makes a reader lose his/her interest in book. A bit of flow of the story needs to be taken care. Also a little stringent proof reading is required. But these are just suggestions….

Final words:

Friday 19 October 2012

Friendship vs Flirting

George Burns once famously said:

‘There will always be a battle of the sexes because men and women want different things. Men want women, and women want men.’

Flirting and friendship... I have a hard time distinguishing the two. Especially if no one spells it out. What's the difference? In order to understand this better first we need to understand what is meant by friendship and what is flirting called.


Friendship is an honest and charming way to get to know other people. You learn to increase your social activity, sharpen your communication skills, and build self-confidence. It is a feeling of comfort and emotional safety with a person. It is when you do not have to weigh your thoughts and measure words, before keeping it forth before your friend. It is when someone knows you better than yourself and assures to be your side in every emotional crisis. It is when you can sleep fighting and get another morning with a better understanding. Friendship is much beyond roaming together and sharing good moments, it is when someone comes to rescue you from the worst phase of life. Friendship is eternal.

Different people have different definitions of friendship. For some, it is the trust in an individual that he / she won't hurt you. For others, it is unconditional love. There are some who feel that friendship is companionship.


Flirting is meant to be a positive thing in your life. A nice and a healthy flirt amongst friends by understanding each-other border lines is always good, but the worst part is that now a days in real life or our virtual worlds as well the ‘Flirting’ has become a social intercourse instead of  a friendly conversation. We all flirt differently (or maybe similarly), but everyone I know seems to have a slightly different definition. Some of my friends just say "touching the other person slightly, holding hands, etc.," which is what I view as "obvious cheap flirting". Other friends tell me that it entails laughing at people, smiling a lot, or making conversation. Well...does that mean I flirt with my friends? 

The key to friendly flirtation is lightheartedness and subtlety. Two people who flirt often will likely have a rhythm to their interactions; it’s like a routine. This type of play has underlying and unsaid boundaries that maintain a friendly feel.

Friendship vs Flirting

Now let us come to the point I stated above the comparison or the difference of these two in present world be it is real or virtual. People has now changed the definition of friendship for men if any of the female is little open-minded or friendly she becomes easy available prospect for exploitation for them. Now days for any man if a girl likes to spend time with him or talk more that means, she has a liking for him or loving him, that thereafter the start taking undue advantage of this relation. Here am not saying it is not a case with men there are few exceptional in females as well who are sailing in the same boat.

We all have to understand the importance & difference of these two relations and act accordingly. Else as humans some day we would stand on the verge of all fake relation, which involves more of using each other for benefits or pleasure instead of enjoying, creating or cherishing these lovely friendly moments.

Monday 15 October 2012

Real world vs virtual world

The way communication in the virtual world can affect behavior in real life was the starting point for my blog today.

We writers have always been observers, tucking away incidents and anecdotes in mental notebooks knowing, they might be the seed from which future writing grows.

When I was writing regularly for the next blog. I did this all the time, letting ideas simmer away at the back of my mind before I retrieved them and turned them into a blog. In doing so, am almost always a wittier, more clever woman than the real me  here and now because I had the time to polish the words through which she was shown.

Virtual world

Virtual Reality is considered one of the most exciting technologies today, constantly evolving and improving. Now electronic media has turned more people into writers, bloggers, tweeters, facebookers  . . . These media enables them not just to chronicle what’s happening to them but to do so almost instantly. There is a danger that in doing that people could let the real world becomes less important than the virtual one, for which it provides inspiration and let the virtual one shape the real one. Like many other phenomena, social networking can be a force for good if you use it wisely and well or a force for ill if you don’t.

Technology is the process through which human beings and machines interact and, therefore, create culture. The online shopping sites innovation actually affords the speed and convenience of online shopping with the feel of a brick and mortar store, and in doing so, sits in between physical and virtual spaces.

Beginning with the Internet revolution of the ‘90s through the development our lives have continually expanded to occupy virtual spaces. In Second Life, we bought virtual houses with real money; when playing Farm-Ville, we wake up in the middle of the night to save our virtual grapes from rotting.

Real World

In reality if we move out of our virtual world and spare some time to meet real people and interact with them. there will be a new learning to an individual. Interaction to humans always opens new dimensions for us , in terms of experiences, opportunities, learning. This will also work as a stress buster for us. We all have different pressures in our lives, work, family and career. When we meet people personally and spend some quality time we tend to know and discover the different aspects of human nature. We feel relaxed and revived after a short vacation: in the same manner when we meet new people and interact, we feel refreshed and full of  positive energy.

What I personally feel we all should take a break from our hectic routines to come out of our virtual lives and spare some time to meet real people, make real friends or rather we may also plan and meet our virtual friends in reality to know each-other better.

At last I would state here...I have experienced this personally  recently and trust  my friends out there…that was indeed a memorable experience for me…

Friday 5 October 2012

Today’s Entertainment Industry

Since the 50's, the entertainment industry has developed very fast. Technology has not stopped developing because of higher demands from people over time. Due to these changes, there are many problems surfacing in the entertainment industry. Some attribute the immoral climate spreading out in society to entertainment products, which, they say, need to be restricted or controlled.

I understand that entertainment products reflect society and the need to go on following the demand from people. Although, at the same time entertainment shouldn't be restricted or controlled by government till the time is it not crossing the norms and values of our society.

There are many differences in looking at the effects of entertainment products on people. Over here what I am trying to say is, , along with the positive effects these entertainment products are also imparting negativity amongst society by making violent products more popular in society; moreover, they become the fondness of people nowadays. Because of this, crime , attack on sex and violence are becoming a popular culture.

However, the effects of entertainment products on people are visible enough now days and there have been evidence that proves that there is  an influence on people by entertainment products. In other words, entertainment can be combined with education to make a better society. Nevertheless, by the other solution the entertainment industry will simultaneously develop with society. The truth about society will be shown, and from this people can be aware of the value of life.

However, the entertainment industry should develop by itself because viewers and listeners will evaluate and eliminate. That means producers have to meet the demands of the people. On the other hand , the solution can make the entertainment industry develop better and better.

Violence in entertainment

Does violence in media affect people? Violence is a common sight in media today whether it is seen on the television, Internet, or heard on the radio. Violence is all around society. It is what many people want to see. Some of these same people want to act out the violence they are witnessing. Yes, I believe that violence in media affects people. It affects how people think, act, and speak. Some of people’s actions are more affected by others, but the fact is that it still affects people. Violence affects how people think, how they react to certain situations, in a violent manner, because of what they have seen or heard. If someone is watching a television show and he or she sees an actor react violently in a certain situation, then they might think and believe that a violent reaction is the way to go. They may think that since it’s  the TV, the person is acting.

Advantages and disadvantage of entertainment

There are many advantages and disadvantages of the entertainment industry but a few are:

If you are in a bad mood, you would obviously need someone to cheer you up and if you are bored and you need entertainment, the TV provides you with different activities and other things that  entertain you.

And the disadvantage of the entertainment industry is that sometimes it gives out so much of the information that it is sometimes inappropriate for children. For example live TV shows include strong language.

Friday 28 September 2012

The Problem Of Prostitution- How To Overcome It

What is Prostitution?? Prostitution is the act or practice of engaging in sex acts for  money. While prostitution is legal or tolerated in some cultures, it is illegal or socially discouraged in others. Motivations for suppression can vary significantly, from basic moral repugnance to concerns about the effects on society and on those who practice it, as well as whether it is an exploitative practice. In most cultures the prostitutes (the persons who sell sexual services) are socially stigmatized.

Prostitution is nothing but a curse to those whose are involved in this shameful act. But it has been flourishing since ages either in the name of hobby of the rich or due to family circumstances. Even then a prostitute is the most condemned creature of the society. She is treated worst than the animals and thus she has to lead a miserable life of an out caste in the society. There are two main reasons, why women take to prostitution. The first reason is the greed to accumulate more and more money and the second reason is the lack of necessities of life. Some women are greedy by nature and are fond of a glamorous life. Not only this, they have the inner urge to have sex with many men.

This unconscionable tendency in  a woman, turns her into a prostitute. The second reason is lack of funds to exist in life. Some women are forced to live the life of the prostitute due to bad circumstances. These types of women are very poor and they don’t have sufficient money to lead a decent life, thus, they tune to prostitution in order to fulfill their necessities of life. The woman loses her modesty after becoming a prostitute. She becomes vulgar and shameless. Women and children from India are sent to the Middle East daily. Girls in prostitution and domestic services in India, Pakistan and the Middle East are tortured, held in virtual imprisonment, sexually abused, and raped. India and Pakistan are the main destinations for children under 16 who are trafficked in south Asia.

The following steps should be taken by the Govt. and voluntary agencies to eliminate prostitution:

  • They should be educated about the consequences of having sex with many men. They should be made aware of the diseases occurring due to this shameless act and how their status in the society is  condemned.
  • They should be given spiritual education  in meditation and lectures from spiritual texts.
  • They should be given employment opportunities, and given jobs according to their caliber and hard work.
  • Last but not the least, they and their children must not be condemned by the society, but corrected, instead, so that they are able to lead a disciplined life in the society.
  • Prostitution activities are initiated to alleviate the stressors associated with poverty, structural barriers, and family dysfunction
  • Social Adjustment- Adapting to new environment
  • Modification of one’s behavior to accommodate personal & social needs
  • Intense street learning focusing on the code of conduct including protective strategies & introduction to the lifestyle of prostitution
  • Re-evaluation of life their lives.
  • Restrictive factors (pressures from law enforcement & child protective services) & Physical deterioration

Tuesday 25 September 2012

Save Girl Child Save Womanhood

In ancient India, the birth of a girl child was hailed as auspicious. We have inherited the cultural legacy of having strong non-preference among all communities, religious groups and citizens of varied socio-economic backgrounds. Women are the receiving end in Indian society. They are ill treated or tortured at every stage. A girl child is in bondage from her very childhood. She is under constant vigil, first by the parents, then her husband and finally her own children. Not only that, she is often condemned to death even before she is born. This is called female killing in the womb itself.

Women’s work is limited to household duties. At the time of marriage, dowry is given by the bride’s family to the groom’s for shouldering ‘the burden of the bride’. In many communities, as custom female babies are killed immediately after birth, either by the mother or by elderly women of the family to relieve themselves from the life of humiliation, rejection and suffering.

Social discrimination against women results in systematic neglect of women’s health, from womb to tomb. Female infanticide and female feticide are widely practiced in many States.

The reason of female infanticide can be linked with the evil of dowry  prevailing in our society. A more degrading and disparaging feature of the society has seen existing for the last two decades is the immense love for a male child and the elimination of a female fetus. With the invention of new technologies to monitor the ‘Fetal’ health, it was expected to be used for taking care of the health of the unborn child, but it became the terminator of female fetus. Are female fetus being deliberately eliminated or aborted, is the question? Answer is, yes!, to  a great extent. Are the technologies (ultra-sonography, material serum analysis etc.) assisting in elimination? Again the answer is; yes, to a great extent.

The greatest tragedy is that, women themselves permit the death of their daughters as mercy killing. Unwanted baby girls are often left on the road or in the maternity homes at night. This is due to the  illegitimate sex before marriage or due to the death of the husband , who maybe the only source to take of the mother and child.. This unhealthy practice has caused great imbalance in the ratio of boys and girls in several states and communities. To prevent this situation we must provide proper education and strict laws, which can trap the criminals..

Biologically girls are stronger. While there can be no moral or ethical justification for feticide still, it continues to be practiced. In fact sex determination which was mainly restricted to metros only now, is prevalent in villages as well. If sex determination tests are allowed to proliferate, and the elimination of female fetuses allowed, the society should be ready to pay for this sin soon, in near future.

The greatest supporters of a child (whether male or female) are the natural parents. If a girl has a father who loves her and grants all her fundamental rights that girl is  invaluable. Fathers often provide material comforts but deny daughters their right to choose their life partner.

For a daughter there can be no greater misery, than to know that her father does not support her. If she was an unwanted child, the despair is compounded. To go through life and realize that she was thrust on her unwilling parents is a fate much worse than death. What can be more disgracing than the feeling of nothing more than a contraceptive failure?

It is true that women should have the right to abort their unwanted fetus, but if the technology is being used only to eliminate the female fetus, then it should be questionable.

The root cause for elimination of female fetus is to be traced unless the evil of forced marriages, dowry, and illiteracy among the females are done away, with, but lives of women will not improve. Banning prenatal sex determination might add a feather in the caps.

A social awakening for true respect  for the girl child is required., A lot of honest hard work with full political ‘will’ in this field can only solve the problem of girl fetus killing.

A few lines from a poem on women is coming to mind. ..Here for you all…

Women are wonderful!
They are graceful!
They have compassion and concern for fellow beings!
they are care  takers of family & society!
They should be appreciated, admired, respected!

At the end, I would just say let us educate & sensitize people, change mindset & attitudes, save girl child on war-footing.

Friday 21 September 2012


As we are humans. we tend to get affected by our surroundings, by our work pressure, by problems in personal or professional lives and by the behavior of our near and dear ones. This pressure results in rudeness in our behavior  and sometimes we vent out our frustration by being rude to our close ones.
Did anyone of us ever notice the after effects of it ? Did we ever think for a while that how our near and dear one would be feeling after we misbehaved.?

Have you ever watched one person act rudely towards another? Isn't it embarrassing? You may well feel sorry for the target and maybe wonder if you should intervene or something.
Did you know that it can also damage your mental performance, stunt your creativity and make it more likely that you will be less social towards others?

It has  been observed by different universities in researches that if you have been a target of rudeness or a witness that directly or indirectly affects one’s peace and performance. In subsequent tests, those who saw the rudeness solved less problems, came up with fewer creative ideas and were less likely to volunteer for other activities.

So what's going on? When we see others being threatened or in distress, we tend to perform a threat assessment, wondering what harm may be done. We may well empathize with the victim, feeling their distress and perhaps wondering if we should intervene in some way.

We may also worry about what we would do in their position. Maybe also we side with the aggressor, thinking that the target deserved the rude comment (though such thoughts seem less likely). Whatever goes through our heads, it takes cognitive effort and can be emotionally draining, all of which distracts us from the task in hand and may make us more reticent about sticking our necks out in future.

The implications for workplaces where rudeness is commonplace are very significant. It is not just the victims but everyone within earshot and even those who hear about it someway are affected. And the bigger sufferer is the employer, customers and shareholders.

Now in order to get the victim out of this trauma phase , best would be to apologize . A proper apology should always include  detailed discussion of the situation, acknowledgement of the hurt or damage done, taking responsibility, recognition of role in entire situation, statement of regret, asking forgiveness, promise that it won’t happen again  and most important trust in the relationship.

Wednesday 12 September 2012

Self Development: Response Vs Reaction

At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady. She started screaming due to fear. With a panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach. Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got panicky.

The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but landed on another lady in the group. Now, the waiter rushed forward to their rescue. In this chaos, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter. The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt. When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers and threw it out of the restaurant.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behavior? If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed? He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos. It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach. I realized that, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it’s my inability to handle their behavior  that disturbs me. It’s not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle such situations that disturbs me. More than the problem, it’s my reaction to the problem that creates chaos in my life. 

Lessons from the story: - I understood, I should not react in life. I should always respond. The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded. Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always well thought of,  and save a situation from going out of hand, to avoid cracks in life, to avoid taking decisions in anger, anxiety, stress.

After The Delhi Bomb Blast

In the market, where items  fell off the shelves, people were picking up things so honestly together, and then quietly standing in line to buy food. Instead of creating panic and buying as much as needed, they bought as little as they needed. I was proud to be an Indian.

When I was walking back home, , there was a lady holding a sign that said, ’Please help us serve these bomb blast victims.’  They were shifting the injured to the nearest clinic, nursing home or hospital. There was not even a single sign of hate or enmity amongst these people from different religions. I was really touched, when I saw the warmth of the people.

Different schools in the vicinity were giving out candies. High school girls were taking as many as they could. I was forced to think," For What???"  But in the next minute, they reached the children in the evacuation place and handed it to each one of them. That was a sweet gesture.

My co-worker wanted to help somehow, even if it was just helping  one person.  So he wrote a sign: "If you're okay with a motor cycle, I will drive you to your house."  He stood there with that sign. And then I saw him taking away one gentleman to his house, all the way to NCR!  I was so moved. I also felt like helping others too.

A high school boy was saved because he hid himself under the broken shed little away from the spot where the blast took place. The blast was so sudden, that he just saw people caught with fire trying to frantically hides themselves from the mess happening around. To help others, I kept asking them about his  loved ones so that they can be informed. That poor kid still was unable to reach his own parents but just said, "It’s nobody's fault. There is no one to blame. We have to stay strong."

There was a lack of medical services being offered. The medical help was either closed or were having very long lines. I got worried, since I was behind 15 people. I was trying to help out that small little boy. Finally, when it was my turn, the man smiled and said, "Because of this situation, we are only giving some quantity to everyone. Is that alright?"  "Of course its alright.  I'm just glad that we are all able to help these victims as much as we can," I said.  His smile gave me so much relief.

I saw a little boy thanking a road cleaner, saying, "Thank you so much for trying hard to help him in getting out of the place easily."  It brought tears to my and the employee's eyes, too .

A friend told me that she was shocked to see a long, neat queue form  behind one public phone. Everyone waited patiently to use the phone even though they must have been eager to call their families.

The traffic was horrible!! Only one car could move forward at a green light. But everyone was driving so calmly. During the 10 hour drive (which would only take 30 minutes normally) the only horns I heard was a horn of thank you. It was a fearful time -- but then again a time of warmth and it made me love India more and more.

Last night when I was walking home (since all traffic had stopped), I saw an old lady at a bakery shop giving out free bread.  Even at times like this, people were trying to find what they can do and it made my heart warm.

When I was waiting at the metro platform, so tired and exhausted, a homeless person came to me and gave me a cardboard to sit on.  Even though we usually ignore them in our daily life, they were ready to serve us.

A juice company was donating free drinks. Different food products were given by food companies, and everyone was trying to help the best way they could.  

We too, have to stand up and do our best.

In one area, when the electricity returned, people rejoiced.  And then someone yelled: "We got electricity because someone else probably conserved theirs!  Thank you so much to EVERYONE who saved electricity for us.  Thank you everyone!"

An old man at the evacuation shelter said, "What's going to happen now?"  And then a young high school boy sitting next to him said, "Don’t worry!  When we grow up, we will promise to fix it back!"  While saying this, he was rubbing the old man's back.

Through all this, I felt hope. There is a bright future, on the other side of this crisis.

This is what we call as Hope …

Wednesday 29 August 2012

Love Is Complicated

Love is a complicated situation to be in. We prepare ourselves to fight the world for it, but sometimes love itself lets us down and we are left in a dilemma to wait or to move on !! Truth is, that if we loved someone from the depth of our hearts, then we fail to accept that we were betrayed and we fail to let them even go. We try and we fail to move on and we are only left with an option to fool ourselves that one day 'The one' will return back tous  and value the feelings that I have for ‘The one’" !!!

Love is complicated and is probably the understatement of all times. It's hard  to find someone and fall in love to begin with, let alone finding someone you love and the complications of life that keep you apart..
People have to live with this for the rest of their lives and ‘WE’ still function like normal human beings. Talk about your own cross to bear.

To truly love someone, your love for each other has to be unconditional love. Period! If there are conditions on your love, then it's not really love, but rather a convenience of sorts. You may get along, and enjoy each other’s company, but as soon as baggage shows up, differences of opinion arise., Then you say to yourself, this isn't worth it anymore, then the  supposed love for each other was not truly unconditional love.

Yes, people change, and some people tend to start to grow apart too. Let's not forget problems with friends and family members make a relationship go sour too. Then is the strain of finances, working so many hours that you and your partner become strangers. Raising children isn't as easy as pie, especially if you have ones that are challenged.

There are ex-husbands, ex-wives, step children, loss of jobs, separations, and a multitude of other challenges I haven't even mentioned. Dealing with all these issues that may affect your lives, and still loving and nurturing each other, is unconditional love.

The separation and/or divorce from each other can then be considered what? Well, to be fair here, there are reasons that even if unconditional love may have existed initially, physical abuse is one very good reason to leave this relationship. And of course there are more, but this article is about unconditional love. The decisions to leave are yours and yours alone.

But as problems arise in relationships and marriages, for some if not all, there are bound to be problems. We are humans after all. But it is dealing with the issues, is what unconditional love is all about.
They may not be easy, and they may be heartbreaking. But if you remember how much you loved this person the first day you said, I LOVE YOU, then you need to hold that feeling close to your heart, and work it out.

We all fall in lust, and we all fall in like. Some may say this is impossible. People change, or they weren't like this when we got together or married, some say. Can it be a difficult situation? In a word, yes. But if you tell someone you love them, and it is based on the condition that things never change from where they are now, then is it really love? Or maybe just a lot of like ??

Love Is Just Complicated
You ask me to communicate
What it is I feel within
I search for words to assist
But., I find none to help me begin
I guess love is just complicated
Love is just complicated.

I thought I knew my heart's desire
I thought I quenched my burning fire
I thought I wanted "A"
But "A" was to mixed up with "B"
Then "C" made me more confused
So "A" turned off me and "B" feels
Better. "C" is upset and lonely
And me, I think Love is complicated....

Love is just complicated....